Things I Was Afraid to Admit as a New Nurse — And Why They Made Me Stronger
It’s okay, it’s safe to confide here.
Nursing school teaches you the science. The NCLEX tests your memory. But nothing quite prepares you for the emotional rollercoaster that is your first shift as a nurse.
I used to think I was the only one feeling overwhelmed, second-guessing myself, and praying no one noticed how terrified I was.
Spoiler: I wasn’t alone — and neither are you.
So here it is: a list of things I was scared to admit as a new nurse… but probably should have. I hope they help you feel less alone, and a little more grounded, wherever you are in your journey.
Let’s dive in!
💬 1. “I had no idea what I was doing — and I was afraid someone would find out.”
It didn’t matter that I passed the NCLEX or knew my lab values inside out. I constantly worried that someone — a preceptor, a patient, a seasoned nurse — would figure out I was barely holding it together.
But here's the truth: imposter syndrome is rampant among new grads.
What matters isn’t knowing everything — it’s knowing when to ask questions, pause, and double-check.
“Confidence doesn’t mean knowing it all. It means knowing when to slow down and ask.”
💬 2. “I cried in the med room — more than once.”
Some shifts just hit harder than others. Maybe it’s a code. Maybe it’s a patient’s story. Maybe it’s just pure exhaustion.
And yes — I’ve cried in supply rooms, bathrooms, empty break rooms. More than once.
I was a student nurse on a paid shift on second shift at the hospital where my clinicals were occuring. I had a client who had a colostomy and I had only dealt with them in the lab. His needed emptying and I tried and made a huge mess. Stool was on the patient, stool was on the sheets, and stool was on me! And my scrubs! The evening shift nurse came in and rescued me. By the way he was an ostomy patient himself and he showed how to empty it without making a mess. He even showed me how to use toilet paper instead of wash clothes to wipe just like you would if it were his rectum. We cleaned up the patient and the bed. I changed my clothes and we went on with the shift. Later in the break room I asked the evening shift nurse if I was going to make a good nurse. He told me, “Yes because you ask questions”. I started to cry and ran to restroom I did not want him to see me cry.
I’ve learned since then: “Tears don’t mean you’re breaking. They mean you care.”
“Do I even belong here??”
💬 3. “I didn’t feel like I belonged — even in scrubs.”
It took me weeks — maybe months — to feel like a “real” nurse. I questioned whether I had what it took, even as I showed up every day and gave my all.
No one tells you this, but it’s totally normal not to feel like you belong right away. That identity takes time to build.
“You won’t feel like a nurse overnight. But with every shift, you’re becoming one.”
💬 4. “I was afraid to speak up — even when I had a gut feeling something was off.”
I second-guessed my instincts constantly. Even when I felt something wasn’t right, I stayed quiet — afraid of being wrong, or being “too new” to speak up.
But gut feelings are part of clinical judgment. And the more you listen to them, the sharper they become.
“Now I know: If something feels off, it’s always worth saying something.”
💬 5. “I felt like I was failing because I didn’t love every minute of it.”
There’s this idea that if you don’t wake up in love with nursing every single day, you’re not meant to be here.
That’s a lie.
Some days are hard. Some days are exhausting. Some days, you won’t feel like a nurse — or even like a person.
I was given a patient who no one else wanted. I had not been to work for three days, so I was chosen. No one would tell me why. Then it happened. I smelled it before I even got to the room. What is that I asked the other student nurse? She giggled and said, “C diff, enjoy!”.
I went into the room after gowning up and almost puked from the smell. I ran into the bathroom several times with dry heaves but never puked. When I got out of there the whole shift of staff were there laughing as I came out. They knew I had no idea what I was in for. I left that night not liking nursing or my coworkers. I knew I would not survive this it everyone treated me this way!
“Nursing doesn’t always feel like a calling. Sometimes, it just feels like survival — and that’s okay.”
💙 It’s okay!
You’re not the only one who’s scared. You’re not behind. You’re not broken.
Every nurse has their own version of these confessions — even if they don’t say them out loud. The truth is: fear means you care. Doubt means you’re learning. And vulnerability? That’s where the real strength starts.
You CAN do this!
📣 What’s something you were afraid to admit as a new nurse?
Drop it in the comments or DM me — let’s normalize the things nobody talks about but everyone experiences. Your experiences might help another nurse feel less alone.
Next Week on the Blog:
Ever frozen in a moment where you knew something was wrong — but couldn’t move?
I’ll be sharing what happened during my first code… and what it taught me about trusting my gut.
🫣 Stay tuned for The Silent Panic.
Comment below!
I invite my readers to join a discussion in the blog comment section to share tips and support each other in developing this essential skill.
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